Star Wars

As you probably already know if you've read A Night at the Movies, my wife is not really into films or most of the general nerd stuff that I love. Recently, I was reminded of something I posted on Facebook years ago when we were apparently watching one of the original Star Wars films.

It occurred to me that it would be interesting to revisit her familiarity with one of the most beloved film franchises in all of nerd culture after all this time. Since we originally had that conversation we have grown to be each others closest companions, gotten engaged, married, and shared a life together. We have lived together and gone through the experience of moving to a new home, away from our old friends where we are each others primary lifeline in a new town. After all of that time shared together I wondered if she had absorbed any greater familiarity with Star Wars.

She had not.

I interviewed her on the plot of the original films. The following is Star Wars, as described by my wife:

M: Okay, so walk me through the story. Start at the beginning.

E: So it opens up in a desert and its Luke Skywalker and the robots and his Aunt and Uncle cause his Dad died. And his Mom died, I guess.

M: What are the robots names?

E: R2-D2 and C3-PO


M: Okay, what happens?

E: He finds out he has the Force and he gets upset and runs away.

M: How does he find out he has the Force?

E: He can move things with his mind.

M: So he's just going along and he accidentally moves things with his mind and finds out he has the Force?

E: Yeah.

E: So he gets upset and runs away and runs into Yoda.

M: Why is he so upset?

E: His aunt and uncle kept things from him and he's upset because he doesnt understand the Force.

M Okay where are they while all this is happening?

E: Vulcan.

M: Alright, so he's on Vulcan with his Aunt and Uncle and the robots, and finds out he has the Force and runs away, and finds Yoda?

E: Yeah

M: Okay, so he finds Yoda and then what?

E: Yoda sees he needs guidance so he goes with Luke and the robots. They go to the bar.

They meet Han Solo and Chewy, and they see that blubber guy.

E: They say "Something is up" and they see Princess Leia in her sleazy outfit and they don't like it.

M: And they know shes a Princess?

E: Yeah I think Han Solo recognizes her. 

M: Okay.

E: Yeah they get her, and go on Han Solo's ship

M: Whats Han Solo's ship called?

E: ..... What's the President's plane called?

M: Air Force One?

E: Yeah That.

M: So Han Solo, Chewy, the robots, Luke Skywalker, Princess Leia, and Yoda are all Air Force One and escaped the booger guy, what do they do now?


E: They just go to space and eventually end up on a jungle planet and Yoda helps Luke learn the force. 

E: I think Luke wants to kill Darth Vader because he thinks Darth Vader killed his dad and he needs to learn the Force to fight Darth Vader.

M: So it's all because Luke wants to fight Darth Vader for killing his dad?

E: Yea.  Probably his mom too.

M: So they're on the planet and Yoda trains Luke so he can fight Darth Vader, for killing his dad-

E: And his mom.

M: And his mom.

M: So what happens next. 

E: So they go to the Death Star and they fight. There is a big room with a bridge and Luke and Darth Vader fight with their light sabers and Darth Vader is falling and says:  "Luke I'm your Father."

M:  As hes falling?

E: Yea.


E: And that's the End.

E: Oh and there are storm troopers too.